Morning in the
forest. Legolas Greenleaf Gloin was
setting a breakfast table for his love and faithful husband, when he heard a
disgusting retching sound coming from their oak tree loft. Legolas rushed to his
“Oh beloved! Feeling sick again this week? Let me help you!” The young blond
elf held and cuddled the sturdy and sweaty dwarf to his chest, waiting for his
love's breath get normal.
Gimli Gloin Greenleaf was blushing furiously while trying to find a way to tell
his beloved the truth he have been hidding for a month. The whole, dirty, infamous truth… His voice was none
close to his thunderous usual one as he spoke like a lost sheep!
“You know, Legolas, we are built quite different in body…”
“Yes! We are! But I don’t care beloved! This is the beauty of it all! And I
don’t care!” Legolas kissed and hugged tightly Gimli.
All that fuss did not help Gimli at all… He tried again. “Yes love, I
don’t care either! Differences are spices for the souls. * Oh well, maybe too
much spicy to burn one in doom* But you see… Heh…I have tried too much spice
“Are you tired of me, friend Gimli?” Legs leaned back and stared at the
“NO! None of that! And shut up will you? Stiff neck elves
and all!! What I am saying is that I have bodily functions that most males
don’t have and…”
Legolas cut Gim once more to snuggle into the red beard. Gimli wondered, annoyed
a good deal, about this denial attitude. He had a need to cry and set free from
the too much loving arms!
“Silly elf! Stop it! And let ME speak!” Legolas looked at him with sweet and
hurt puppy eyes. Hurt. That was even worse! * Stupid dwarf!* Gimli murmured to
himself. And now he wanted to weep and let tears fall free. Oh shameful mood
swings!! This situation was already too bad without them…
“Sorry Legolas. But it is difficult!” Gimli breathed deeply and sputtered at
once: “I-got-pregnant-with-child. But-I-am-sorry-it-is-not-yours.”
Legolas’s face went from joy to utter sorrow and disappointment. “Not mine? So
you are tired of me!! Boo hoo hoo!!!!!!!” He cried noisily, wiping his tears
with his tunic’s hem, while he asked. “Who is the father then?”
“Éomer. Heh…remember our scathing around Rohan fields? The one time you sent me
away to… after the...”
“Boo hoo hoo!!! Not mine!!! Boo hoo hoo!!!!” He kept crying ridiculously.
Elves didn’t cry enough and when they did, sometimes it sounded pathetic!
“I wish you would see it was before us! Us being settled!! And it was meaningless! More of a point of
view proving! Problem was that I forgot I could…well, you know!!” Gimli was
fidgeting with his sharp axe, very interested in its hold carvings. “Eomer
knows about it, but will not help or assume. I can’t be a single father! Old
Gloin will kill me for a second time! After coming to live with an elf, I end up
betraying him! Double disgrace! Boo hoo hoo!!!” Gim sniffed and wept and
sobbed “Would you adopt the child my love?”
“Ooh the pain!! But I accept our sad fate and your child! Beloved Gimli! Your
offspring will be cared as my own! And to prove my love for you both, allow me to
name our kid!” Legolas eyes danced with high emotions.
Gimli eyes went as wide as never before, almost popping out of their sockets. He
knew Legolas’s dreams…oh he knew them well. Shudder! The name was worse than a curse!
“These names I chose will unite our families Gimli! So, if it is a boy, he will
be Gloinanduill. And if a girl, she will be Luthienóin! Oh the beauty of
it!!” The excited elf sighed and almost floated in the air. Little pink hearts
decorated his eyes.
Gimli shook his head and run from his elevated crazy elf, into the safety of the forest,
crying to any deity: WHY? WHY? Why, if he was male? WHY?* Wish never had crossed
the path of crazy slasher Em!! Why?!!!*
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